


The look

by DangerRollins



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: M/M, carl is a badass, carl is the itch in negans asshole, negan is an asshole but what else is new, negan is an asshole who happens to love kids
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-25
Updated: 2017-12-09
Packaged: 2019-02-06 19:47:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,734
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12824793
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DangerRollins/pseuds/DangerRollins
Summary: Negan can't get Carl to stop giving him that damned one-eyed glare.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This timeline is fucked lmaooo. Picture season seven Carl/Judith and imagine that Negan was around when the huge herd happened in season six. Also, Glenn and Abraham are already dead. *Shrug*

Negan couldn't stand that damn look. It irked his nerves and prickled his balls.

Many people had given him that look before, but that didn't mean he was used to it. Every time somebody dared look at him like that--Like they wanted to murder him on the spot, like there was something they wanted to say, like they were gonna kick his ass and make him beg for mercy--It always surprised him. It usually went one of two ways for them.

One.

He'd threaten to kill them or do something even more sadistic and they'd be sure to fix their faces before they were forced to deal with the consequences. This was the tactic he'd used not too long ago on Rick, and as usual, it had worked.

Two.

He threatened to kill whoever was giving him that look or do something even more sadistic and if they took his threats lightly or took him for a joke, he'd do it. He'd show them he meant it. Then, the look he hated was replaced permanently with the look he liked. Anger was replaced with fear, hatred replaced with sadness, a pleading look there no matter what.

And now apparently there was a third option.

He wasn't about to kill the little asshole, that wasn't blood he wanted on his hands. Carl Grimes was a valuable human being capable of many things that he didn't even know about, and Negan outright refused to put an end to his existence.

But clearly, no amount of threatening would wipe that damn look off his face.

"I'm doing you assholes a favor and that's the thanks I get?" He questioned as he bounced the baby around in his arms. "A cold stare and a wordless goodbye?"

"Feed her at three o'clock. Not four o'clock, not five o'clock, not two thirty, not one. Three. And again at seven, and again at eleven if she happens to wake up or stay up 'til then. If she doesn't, don't worry about it. She'll most likely sleep through the night." He ignored Negan's words as he, for once, gave the leather jacket wearing asshole orders. "If she cries for dad, give her this to distract her." Carl handed Negan her favorite toy, a stuffed bunny he'd found in a house a few months ago. "She cries for me, give her this." And then he held out his hat. Negan raised his brows quickly and shook his head dramatically as he stared at the hat being held out in front of him.

"Well, shit!" He exclaimed loudly. "I've seen you with this thing off, what, twice? Maybe? You sure you can go a whole day without it?"

"She likes to wear it, she likes to play with it, and it reminds her of me. It'll keep her calm, it'll keep her distracted, and that's all I'm worried about. Don't lose it, don't touch it any more than you have to and do not let her chew on it." He demanded, his eye narrowing even more than it'd been before. Negan couldn't deny that Carl was one frightening teenager. He meant business, that was for damn sure.

"Yeah yeah, anything else, mom?" Negan rolled his eyes.

Carl nodded as he stood closer to Negan, his face only an inch or so away from the older man's. He stared at him for a good minute before beginning to talk again. "You get away with a lot of shit, Negan. You take our shit, you show up here whenever you damn well please, you treat us like we're nothing but your little slaves, you've killed a lot of our people--" He paused, his nostrils flaring as he continued to stare Negan down. He balled up one of his fists as his other hand gripped Negan's shirt. "We've been your little bitches. We've taken it. We've done nothing about it. If it wasn't for my dad I would've killed you already, but I respect him and I trust him and if he thinks that bending over backward to please you and your minions is the way to go, I'll do it. For now. But if you do anything, **anything** , to Judy..." Carl shook his head and there was a fire in the young boy's eye that made Negan weak at the knees. "If you or one of your men are too rough with her, if you don't feed her on time, if you hurt her in any way...If you look at her wrong, if you make her cry, if I so much as get the **feeling** that she was mistreated by you...I will end you. I will put a bullet in every part of your body except your fucking brain so that I can kill you twice. Do you understand?"

"Well, look who's balls are twelve sizes larger than when this conversation first started! How do you even manage to carry those things around with you?" Negan smirked. "God **damn** , I am impressed. You aren't the same kid who was crying over an eye, or lack thereof,I should say, just some weeks ago, now are you?"

"I hope you heard what I said. It wasn't an empty threat." Carl stated sternly before practically ripping Judith out of the man's arms. She'd been fussing all through his speech, probably feeling how tense things were and getting scared. Carl quickly kissed her cheeks before squeezing her tightly to soothe her. The last thing he wanted was to scare her.

"I'll carry her to the truck." Carl said dryly before walking off.

Negan sighed as he glanced down at the hat and toy in his hands.

He'd intended for this to scare the kid into submission.

The one thing he didn't fuck around about was his little sister. Negan had never seen the kid so pissed off before, and that was saying something, considering he'd gunned down two of his damn men in an attempt to assassinate him not too long ago.

The Alexandrians had come up short once again. They hadn't been able to scavenge nearly enough supplies for Negan this time around. Something about being distracted trying to fight off a large herd? Whatever the excuse was, it was just that. An excuse.

He figured that when he offered--Or demanded--to take Judith back to the Sanctuary today, that'd surely terrify Carl beyond belief. Make him get on his knees and beg, make a look of something other than pure hatred fill his eyes, something. Anything other than that damn one-eyed glare.

It'd worked on Rick. The man had immediately started begging and pleading and whining and crying, saying anything and everything to get Negan to change his mind. Carl had stood there and watched the scene for a moment before putting a reassuring hand on his dad's shoulder, telling him to go and check on things, and then the one-eyed boy had walked past Negan, bumping his shoulder in the process, and ordered him to follow along.

Not what Negan had been expecting, but he figured once Carl saw him holding Judith he'd finally crack, realizing that this was real and not some kind of sick joke.

He didn't crack.

If anything, he became bolder, angrier, and the look of disgust on his face hadn't gone anywhere.

"Thought you'd be shitting your pants like your old man is right about now. Wanna explain to me why you're not?" Negan had asked.

"My dad blames Glenn and Abraham's deaths on himself. That's the difference between me and him. I don't blame that shit on myself and I don't blame it on him. That was all you. He's grieving, so, he can't see that." Carl explained. "He doesn't wanna see anybody else die, neither do I, but he's thinking he doesn't want anybody else to die because of **him**. So, he's scared of you and he thinks you'll actually go as far as killing his own child-"

"And you don't? What makes you so sure I won't kill her?"

"You're a lot of things, but you're not stupid." Carl shrugged. "You know as well as I do that if anything were to happen to Judith I would not hesitate to murder every one of your men and then you. That's why you're gonna take damn good care of her." He looked at the man for a moment, his eye holding a cold stare. "I'll go get Judy." He muttered.

He walked away after that and didn't utter another word until Negan started speaking again.

Negan didn't know what to do now. He didn't know how he could possibly get Carl to quit glaring at him and start being afraid of him. No matter what he said, no matter what he did, he just couldn't get to the little fucker.

Maybe that was alright. If Carl was afraid of him then he'd be bored again. Carl challenged him and that's what he needed. A challenge. A game to play.

"The next time I show up you better have so much shit for me I won't be able to fit it all in **ten** trucks! If not, well, I won't worry **too** much about it because I'm sure Lucille will handle it." Negan winked before climbing into the truck. He looked around for a moment before his eyes landed on Rick who was holding onto Judith for dear life. The man wasn't even trying to hide the tears slipping down his face. Negan almost felt bad. He was only taking the kid for a day, he'd bring her back tomorrow or have one of his men do it, and Rick was acting like he'd never get to see her again. Probably because he thought he wouldn't.

Negan sighed a little. He could talk all the shit he wanted to talk but truthfully, he'd never lay a finger on a child if he didn't have to. He wasn't a monster, and he liked kids. They were nice, most times. Sure, they could be little shits, but that's adults too so what can you do?

He wanted to tell Rick to go back to his house and take Judith with him. Wanted to tell the man that he'd never hurt his kid, not in a million years, but he couldn't. This wasn't about Rick, it wasn't about Judith, and it damn for sure wasn't about him...Mostly. This was about Carl. All he wanted was for Carl to quit looking at him like he would punch him in the throat at any time. All he wanted was to strike a little fear in the boy. He wanted Carl to think that he was gonna get his sister hurt. Somehow, though, Negan figured Carl wasn't scared because he already knew Negan would never hurt the little angel.

"Ah." He chuckled. "I almost forgot." He pointed Lucille at Judith and Rick flinched back even though Lucille was nowhere near close enough to hurt the little girl. "Hand her over." Negan demanded.

Rick hesitated and choked back a sob before looking toward Carl who'd once again laid a hand on his shoulder to comfort him. "Don't worry, dad. Me and Negan had a little chat. He isn't going to do anything to Judith." Carl's eye nearly burned a hole in Negan's skin as he spoke, venom lacing his voice. Rick didn't believe the boy, but he nodded anyways. He handed Judith to Carl, not able to hand her directly to Negan himself. He just couldn't.

Carl had no problem stepping forward and carefully placing the little girl into Negan's arms. "Love you, Judy." He smiled before kissing her forehead softly. He stepped back to glare at Negan.

"Where's mine?" Negan pouted. Carl shook his head. "Remember what I said. Don't get everyone around you killed. Don't get **yourself** killed."

He didn't give Negan a chance to reply as he walked toward Rick and wrapped an arm around the man's shoulder, leading him away.

Negan sighed and then looked down at Judith who was already staring up at him with wide eyes. He shrugged a little and made a face at her. "I didn't think this through. I don't know what to do with you. Most of my guests don't get to spend time with me. They usually just sit in a dark room for a long time. I don't have to be around them." He sighed. He tilted his head and furrowed his brows as he noticed her making a face at him. He recognized that face. "Don't you start giving me that look too, kid. Don't judge me. You know you look just like your brother when you do that?"

She giggled in response and he sighed, hugging her a little. He loved being around her. She reminded him that there were still some good and pure fucking things in the world.

"Well, we're gonna spend the day together. What do you like to do?"

She reached up and slapped his face a few times.

"What is with Alexandrian women and slapping me?" He questioned.


	2. The look {2}

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "The hell is wrong with you?" Carl questioned skeptically, noticing just how disheveled Negan looked. Negan huffed out a chuckle as he plopped down on the couch. "You failed to mention just how fucking energetic this kid is."

"No harm done?" Carl asked Judith softly, a small smile on his lips as he tickled her. She shook her head, giggling loudly as she squirmed around in his arms. He listened patiently as she began to speak after she was done with her laughing fit, stuttering over her words. "We ride in big truck and run around and read and...and hide and seek and I wear Ne-Ne leather jacket and your hat." She practically yelled in excitement. Carl raised his brows, surprised that she seemed so happy. Sure, he'd been more than sure that Negan wouldn't lay a finger on her in the wrong way--Not if he was smart, which he was--But he hadn't expected for Judith to have such a good time. He figured Negan would feed her and then put her to sleep or make her sit quietly the entire time to make sure that she wouldn't bother him.

"Well, I'm glad you had fun." He grinned. She nodded. "What you do?" She questioned, tilting her head curiously. He chuckled and messed up her hair. "I missed you. That's all I did."

"Yeah." She agreed. "Where daddy?"

"He's coming soon. He had to go talk to Michonne."

"Micho." Judith nodded before wiggling around as she turned back to look at Negan. She reached her arms out to him and Carl tried to keep a hold of her, not wanting Negan to have to touch her anymore, but it was clear that she wanted him, so, after she started to whine a little, he carefully handed her over to the older man.

He took her without complaint, although it was easy to tell that he was tired, and wriggled her around as he sent her a lazy smile. "I come with you again soon Ne-Ne?" She questioned, eyes wide and hopeful as she stared at what she thought was a nice man.

He was melting.

"That's up to your brother and dad, darling, but I'll have you anytime they'll allow it. You're not too bad a guest you know?" He rubbed his cheek on the top of her head, cuddling her as his eyes flashed back to Carl's surprisingly soft ones. He'd meant every word he said. Sure, she was a handful, but she was polite enough and relatively easy to work with. She had no bad intentions and didn't lie to him, try to steal from him, or manipulate him...Well, she did manipulate him a few times, forcing him to read a children's book to her a few more times than he would've liked, but that wasn't so bad. She didn't hold her tongue when it came to speaking to him either. She'd flat out told him that his cooking sucked when he gave her a bowl of carrots--which, by the way, he hadn't even cooked himself so **no** his cooking **did not** in fact suck--and she told him he looked crazy carrying his ugly bat around, and hell, she wasn't wrong.

Being around her put him in a better mood. In this cruel world, it was hard to remember that good people, innocent people, even still existed. She was proof that they did.

They all turned to look at the door when the sudden, harsh sound of it opening filled the room. Judith squirmed her way out of Negan's grasp and ran to Rick as soon as Negan put her down.

Rick gripped her and squeezed her tightly, shutting his eyes and letting out a long exhale. He was glad to see her again period, but to see her happy and clearly unharmed was...Unexpected.

He listened closely as she babbled excitedly about what she and 'Ne-Ne' had done together, repeating what she'd said to Carl but somehow sounding even more excited now, and then she asked Rick the question he hadn't been expecting to hear and didn't know how to answer. "Can I visit Ne-Ne again soon?" She asked, looking at him expectantly with large eyes.

"I-Ugh—I don't think...What?"

"I wanna go back to santary." She tried to say sanctuary and failed, making Negan chuckle softly. "He make nice 'ghetti."

After she complained enough about the carrots he'd caved in and made her spaghetti. It was the one thing he could make perfectly. If she'd insulted **that** , Negan was sure he would've shed a tear.

"I'll have to talk to...'Ne-Ne' about that." Rick glared over at the man as he put Judith down on the ground and patted her back softly. "Why don't you go with Carl and wash up? When you're done, we can play—"

"Hide and seek?" She asked hopefully. He chuckled and nodded. "Whatever you want."

She grinned and all but skipped toward Carl, yelling an excited 'Come on, Cahl!' Before beginning to drag him along.

Rick looked at Negan when his kids were out of sight, not knowing exactly what he should say. He started out with the simplest thing he could think of, although it wasn't really all that simple.

"Thank you." **For not hurting her like I assumed you would since you're a fucking psychopath.** "She seems happy enough...I appreciate—"

"Yesterday when I told you to give her to me you lost your shit." Negan cut to the chase as he leaned back, staring at Rick with a look that Rick had never seen on his face before. He wasn't wearing his usual grin or his scowl. "Why?"

"We both know why." Rick muttered before biting the inside of his cheek. Negan sighed and rubbed a hand down his face. "Listen, I killed your people because your people killed my people and when my people tried to retaliate, your people killed even **more** of my people, and that shit is a **damn** shame, it really is, but I only do what's necessary. What did you think was gonna happen? You think I wouldn't punish you in some way for what you did? You're smarter than that Rick—"

"I thought you'd be dead." Rick grunted. Negan raised his brows and leaned back, a small grin developing as he stared down the man in front of him, unsure if this was the same man he'd seen openly crying like a little bitch yesterday or someone completely damn different.

"Well, Hell, I'm not." Negan stated matter of factly. "I'm very much god damn alive and because of that, because you acted before knowing the whole damn story, because you **failed** to do what you were supposed to do, your people had to pay. I don't kill people just to do it, I kill people when I have to, when it's necessary. "Me killing Judith? That'll never be necessary." He shook his head as he came closer to Rick. "If I'd let your people live after that shit that you pulled, you would've done it again and **more** of my people would've died. I think you and I **both** know that I wouldn't be any kind of a leader if I hadn't done what I did."

"I won't ever forgive you for it." Rick shook his head as he looked down.

"I'm not asking you to." Negan stepped even closer, forcing Rick to look at him again by placing a finger under his chin. "All I'm asking is for you to get your head out of your ass and realize that I wouldn't ever hurt a hair on Judith's head. She's a kid. Didn't ask for this shit."

"Neither did I." Rick mumbled, a weak smile gracing his lips. "Carl seemed pretty sure that you wouldn't hurt her. I was shocked at how calm he was. You give him this pep talk before you took her?"

"No, the kid is just a badass. He threatened the hell out of me **several** times, made it clear to me that he'd kill me and everybody that even knows my name if I hurt her. Don't you dare tell him, but he scared the piss outta me! That kid is tough as shit I'll tell ya—"

Rick kicked Negan's leg as he noticed Carl and Judith back already. He hoped Negan hadn't cursed around Judith much. Her brain was working hard to learn new words, and the last thing he needed was a toddler walking around talking like Negan.

"You talk about it? I stay with him again?" Judith asked as soon as she saw Rick. He sighed and placed his hands on his hips, clearly thinking it over since they hadn't actually talked about that. He couldn't find it in himself to turn her down, and he felt a little more at ease now that Negan seemed to honestly have no plans of harming her, but he couldn't just send his child off with the man. He was too crude, too violent and too unpredictable.

"I think it's gonna be a while before you get to go back to the sanctuary with Negan." He told her slowly, noticing how her face fell. Before she could start to whine he quickly started talking again. "But, I don't see a problem with him coming to visit us every now and then."

"...He still make 'ghetti?" She bargained. Rick chuckled and nodded. She seemed to think for a moment before asking another question. "Ride in big truck again?"

Rick let out a long sigh and shut his eyes. She drove a hard bargain, but he guessed he could agree. "Yes."

"Okay." She grinned. "Hide and seek now. Bye Ne-Ne."

She waved at him before dragging Rick out the door as fast as she could. When they were out of sight, Negan let out a tired sigh.

"The hell is wrong with you?" Carl questioned skeptically, noticing just how disheveled Negan looked. Negan huffed out a chuckle as he plopped down on the couch. "You failed to mention just how fucking energetic this kid is."

Carl shrugged his shoulders as he sat down on the couch as well, as far away from Negan as he possibly could. "I'm glad you listened to me. It would've been hell to find enough ammo to take down all your people."

Negan rolled his eyes as he turned toward the one-eyed boy. "I wouldn't hurt her. Your threats didn't mean shit to me. I just had no intentions of hurting her."

"You were scared and you know it." Carl smirked.

They were quiet for a moment after that, Negan not replying as he shut his eyes. He knew he needed to get back to the sanctuary, but he was sleepy and already felt like he was nodding off. He briefly wondered if the Grimes boys would mind if he nodded off on their couch, but he figured he shouldn't push his limits.

"Negan, why'd you wanna take her?" Carl asked suddenly.

"Figured it'd terrify you beyond belief. Wanted you to stop fucking glaring at me like you wanted to murder me in my sleep."

"I do want to murder you in your sleep."

"Well, you don't have to look like it all the time." Negan grumbled. "You know, one of the Grimes kids likes me already, why don't I go for two? I think you and me are next. Our little bonding time can be spent telling dirty jokes and talking about your lady friends—"

"Get the hell out, Negan."


	3. The look {3}

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What went on while Judy was at the sanctuary.

Negan strolled into the sanctuary casually, Lucille resting on one of his shoulders as she usually did and a not so usual child resting on his other one. He whistled loudly upon entering, and everyone that could hear him kneeled immediately, some sending one another confused looks. Had Negan kidnapped a child? If he had, why?

Negan was just about to start speaking when a wide-awake Judith started squirming in his arms. She'd fallen asleep only a few minutes after they left Alexandria, so of course, by now she was well rested.

He glanced at her and then squatted to put her down. The first thing she did was waddle her way over to a nearby man. She stared at him for a moment before pushing at him, clearly wanting him to fall over. He sent Negan a confused look and Negan glared at him and tilted his head to the side. The man fell down, pretending that Judith had knocked him over and she giggled before moving on to do the same to whoever else she happened to want to pick on. Negan began talking as he kept a close eye on her, making sure she was in no danger.

"Ladies and gentlemen we have a guest for the night." He grinned. "While she's here there will be no god damn swearing, no violence, and damn for sure no bullshit. She'll be with me at all times, but if for some damn reason she's **not** , whoever sees her needs to bring her back to me and if any of you happen to feel brave enough to cause any harm, any harm at all, to a toddler, I will take Lucille and I will shove her up your ass and then down your throat so that you can taste your own shitty ass shit, pun god damn intended. I hope I make myself clear because I would hate to have to do such a vile thing to Lucille."

He stared at all the kneeling people, eyes scanning the room to see if there were any motherfuckers with big enough balls to object, but there were none. He nodded to himself in approval before slowly walking over to Judith, who'd busied herself with trying to hide from Laura by using Arat as a human shield. When Negan was close enough and she noticed him, he grinned down at her and offered his hand. "Come on kid, you've got a lot to see."

***

"Name."

He was done reading a Thomas the Train book for the fourth time. Dwight had brought it by after Negan demanded somebody find some kind of entertainment for the child.

He raised his brows, unsure of what she meant. She had a limited yet expanding vocabulary, and often her words were blunt and seemingly out of nowhere.

"What do you mean?" He asked.

"I Judith." She put a hand on her chest as she introduced herself to him. "Name." She pointed at him. His mouth formed an 'O' shape as he understood what she was asking. "I'm Negan." He smiled.

"Ne...Ne." She couldn't pronounce the man's name, or maybe she could and just wanted to make it a little more simple, whatever the case may be, she was calling him Ne-Ne now and he was fine with it.

"Yeah, that's me---" He was gonna say something else but he couldn't. He wasn't the best at keeping up a conversation with her. With anyone else, he could talk all damn day, because he could say all the bullshit and all the vulgar things he could think of. Usually, either he was making dick jokes, swearing, or threatening, but he could do none of those things right now.

"Cahl."

Judith broke the silence for him. Negan's eyebrows furrowed before he realized what she'd meant. "Cahl." She said again, impatiently awaiting his reply. "Your brother? He's back at your home in Alexandria. He isn't here right now..." He noticed the tears already welling up in her eyes and instantly regretted being so selfish. He shouldn't have taken her away from her home, from her family, for no reason other than to punish them.

He remembered what Carl had said and stood from his not so comfy spot on the floor to retrieve Carl's hat from his bed. When he was back to sitting in front of Judith, he pushed the hat into her hands. "This is his." He said dumbly.

She seemed to perk up at the gesture, her chubby fingers playing with the rim of the hat. She brought it up to her lips after a moment, and he shook his head, moving it away. "He said no chewing." he told her.

There that damn look was again, just like her brother and dad's.

She seemed to be glaring at him as she slowly brought the hat closer to her lips again. It was like she was just begging him to say something to her about it, and would most certainly have a few words herself if he did.

"It makes no difference to me, these are strict orders from Carl." He defended himself as he pulled the hat away from her gently. She looked offended as she yanked it back and brought it up to her mouth again. He sighed and sent her a pleading look. She continued to chew. "Look, I get why he doesn't want your dribble all in his hat, but if he wants you to stop chewing on it he's just gonna have to tell you that himself. What am I supposed to do to stop you? You don't look like somebody I'd want to mess with."

She pulled the hat away only for a moment. "Book. Again."

"I can't read this story again, kid, I can't. We both know what happens. He thinks he can and yeah, he fuckin—he can." He cursed himself for the slip up, but luckily she didn't seem to catch onto it.

"Again." She demands.

"No." He shakes his head, a stern look on his face. "I will not do it. I'm putting my foot down, Judith."

***

After reading the book three more times, he was finally saved from it by Judith's hunger. He hadn't really thought of feeding her, although Carl had told him exactly what times to feed her. Were they two hours late? Yes. But, was she being fed? Yes! That's all that really matters!

"No!" She shook her head, moving her face so that the spoon met her cheek instead of entering her mouth. Negan sighed as he sat the spoon down in the bowl and crossed his hands on the table. "What's the matter? You said you were hungry."

"Carrots bad."

"They're not bad, they're good and fuc--Freaking healthy!" He grinned, bringing the spoon up to his own mouth. He cringed as he tasted them, carrots had never been good to him and it didn't help that these were plain. No salt, no pepper, no nothing. Just plain old carrots, and who the hell likes that?

He didn't know what else to feed her, though. They didn't just have baby food sitting on the shelves and he didn't wanna give her anything that could cause her any harm. He honestly wasn't sure what kids her age could have to eat. He knew she could eat solids now, and he knew that carrots were a healthy food that kids often ate. They were perfectly safe to give to her and he knew that so this is what he settled for.

"See. Great." He muttered after swallowing the disgusting vegetable. The look she was giving him showed him that she wasn't having it. "It's all we've got to work with, Jude."

"Nasty." She shook her head. "Bad...sucks."

"Hey, listen, you don't have to be so mean about it, okay? I'm trying my best here." Negan wasn't sure why he was defending a food he didn't even like so hard, especially since he hadn't even been the one to prepare them. "I wish I could get you something else, but the only thing I know how to make is spaghetti and--"

"Ghetti!" She clapped her hands, nodding. "Getti!"

"Are you allowed to have that?"

"Ghetti!" She nodded again. He sighed. Of course, she'd say she was allowed to have the food she wanted, but was she?

Negan internally cursed at himself. What the hell was he thinking? Did she even know what she was allowed to eat? Probably not.

"If I make this for you and you get sick I will not take the blame." He warned.

"Ghetti."

"Do you understand what you're consenting to here? If your tummy starts hurtin' and your old man gets mad, it's all on you. Alright?"

"Ghetti."

"Fair enough. My consciene will remain clear."

***  
After Negan cooked the spaghetti and they both ate—Judith had very few complaints about the food this time around and Negan was more than thankful for that because truthfully, he'd given his all to make a good meal for her—Judith was clearly growing tired again, refusing to walk on her own which forced Negan to pick her up. She buried her face into his neck and let out a few babbles here and there, but other than that she was quiet. Negan himself was in a sleepy mood, but he had important business to attend to.

"Want me to watch her while you discuss the plans?" Arat asked, although she sounded less than enthusiastic. Kids had always made her uncomfortable, and Negan could tell that by the way she was eyeing the sleeping child liked she'd attack at any moment. "I've got her. Nobody's watching her but me." He said. He didn't want to take his eyes off of her for even just a second. He knew that none of his people were stupid enough to do anything to her, not that they'd want to anyway, but he still felt the need to protect her. He wanted to return her in one, healthy, happy piece.

Negan sat at the head of his table, Judith's deep breaths calming him as he looked at the others sitting at the table. "We've got more than enough supplies, and a few pretty damn cooperative communities, but I'm not stupid. I know it won't always be that way. One of these days these fuckers are gonna hear one too many dick jokes from me and they'll decide to lead a rebellion. When that shit happens we need to be prepared. And I want another outpost, and a helluva lot more people too. Won't happen in a day but it'll happen. Here's how we'll **make** it happen—"

The little meeting was an hour and a half long at least. It was mostly Negan talking in a low murmur as the others listened closely to hear what he was saying, but when the others chimed in he was sure to shush them if they were too loud. He stopped the meeting about halfway through when Judith started squirming, seemingly having a bad dream. He'd told everyone to shut the fuck up and rubbed her back softly until she calmed down and fell into a peaceful slumber again, and then they proceeded.

When the meeting was over, he figured he had an hour or so before Judith woke up again, and he took this time to plan what they'd do when she woke up. He'd been winging it so far and doing pretty damn good, but he knew she'd get bored soon enough and he needed to be ready for it.

***

"You know, Judy, gentle hands get the job done too." Negan winced as he slowly leaned forward, trying to remove his hair from Judith's grip without losing every strand of it—with no success.

"Still." She demanded, now unable to touch his hair even as she stood on her tippy toes. He sighed as he relaxed his body again, allowing her to get back to it. When he'd asked her what she wanted to do he was anticipating an answer somewhere along the lines of 'story' or 'peekaboo' or something simple like that, but nope.

"Hair." She'd said.

He shrugged his shoulders after a moment and sat on the floor with her once again. He'd motioned for her to sit in front of him so he could do something with her hair, but she had other plans.

Now his scalp was burning and regretted even asking the question.

"Can we do something else?"

"Not done." She denied. He pouted. "Are sure you wouldn't rather play...Hide and seek?"

That changed her mind completely.

***

Negan was freaking the fuck out. When they'd left his room again to play a game of hide and seek he hadn't thought much of it. He figured she'd hide somewhere where he'd be able to easily find her and even if she didn't, there were a few people around who could surely point him in the direction she'd gone in, but that wasn't the case. Nobody had seen her go anywhere and he couldn't find her.

It'd been at least fifteen minutes now and he was terrified. What if she got outside somehow and was messing with the walkers? She'd get bit and die and it'd be all his fault!

What if she got a hold of somebody's weapon somehow? The image of Judy with a self-inflicted stab wound was not an image he wanted in his head.

What if she'd somehow fallen straight onto the iron he often used to punish people, face damn first? How would he explain that shit to Rick?

That one was easy. He wouldn't. Rick would murder him before he got the chance to blink and nothing and no one would be able to stop that.

The more Negan looked, the more panicked he became. He was just about ready to sink to the ground and sob out an apology to Judith for failing her when all of a sudden he heard the pitter patter of small feet and suddenly little arms were wrapped around his legs. "Too long." She complained with a giggle.

He stuttered over his words for a moment before raising his brows. "Where were you?"

"Ice cream." She said simply. It was only then that he noticed the dark brown spots surrounding her mouth. He looked away from her to see a sheepish Simon standing a few feet away. "We have ice cream." He shrugged.

"You left me and our game of hide and seek for a simple bowl of ice cream?" He asked in disbelief.

"BIG bowl." She grinned.

"Are you even allowed to have ice cream?"

"Ice cream." She nodded before running off again. Clearly, she was ready for round two of their game.

***

Negan was worn out by the time night time rolled around, and he was glad that Judith seemed to be just as tired. He helped her brush her teeth—which she hadn't enjoyed so much but they got through it in less than fifteen minutes and Negan would consider that a win—and then put her on his bed, surrounded by pillows, cuddling the toy that reminded her of Rick somehow and Carl's hat. When she was fast asleep, Negan crawled onto the couch with a loud sigh and pulled a blanket over himself.

He was out like a light before his head could hit his pillow good.

What seemed like only moments later, he was awake once again, and quite alarmed, because of a tugging at his hand. His first reaction was to grab Lucille but he refrained from that as he noticed it was only Judith who'd somehow gotten out of his bed—uninjured thank the lord—and made her way toward him.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

She didn't answer, instead sleepily reaching toward him. He got the message and picked her up, placing her on his chest and wrapping the blanket around them both. They were both asleep in a matter of minutes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I loved writing this! Thanks for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> I literally have no idea why I wrote this lmaoo I just like badass, unafraid Carl. And adorable baby Judith, of course.


End file.
